Thursday, April 30, 2009

Sometimes it Takes Balls to be a Woman

It is now almost 12:30 AM and I *really* should be in bed. Instead, my husband is busy downloading music from iTunes and I have managed to stay awake while he is doing so while perusing the internet world. Altho, hearing songs such as 'Sometimes it Takes Balls to be a Woman' blaring from the speakers is enuf to help a gal stay awake. At first you think you misunderstood the words, but when you look at your husband and he is grinning, it is obvious you heard exactly right. Courtesy of 'Outlaw Country' on Sirius Radio, my husband was introduced to a singer named Elizabeth Cook - who lends her vocal abilities to this song. Honestly, the song itself is pretty good - but if you ever get bored and wanna google the video for it, you may be a bit disturbed.

But anyway, thats all I gotta say about that =)

In other news, I have found a way to bother people at work without being blatantly obvious about it. It seems that the people at work have become fond of the geese that have considered our office area their home. I find this a bit ironic, as two of these geese ended up pairing off and parking their featherey behinds RIGHT by the door to get into the office. This would have been fine if the geese had been the sort of geese to honk a happy greeting our way as we went by, but they ended up being the kind that decided hissing and running after the people was the better course of action. And at the beginning, I was rootin' for these geese, as it prevented the smokers from standing right in front of the door. However, after feeding them some bread an being rewarded by having them try to attack me still, I decided they were on their own.

So fast forward a bit, the geese eventually have a good reason to be defensive, because there is now an egg/nest by the door. People are wanting something done about the geese, but the fact that these are Canadian Geese present a problem - they are protected by law and you need a permit to have them removed. So..... geese and my coworkers adjust to their living conditions, and everyone seems to adapting fairly well. One day tho, the male was not there - and the next day, the female and egg was gone as well.

So this had everyone a bit worried, despite their initial grumpiness towards the geese, they seemed to genuinely care what had happened to them. So I casually mention the first day they talked about it that I had seen a fox in the area. They talked about the geese disappearing the next day, and I remarked that I had seen a fox in the area the other day. The third day comes and they again are wondering where the geese are. And yet again, I inform them I had seen a fox in the area the other day. One of my coworkers had enuf and said:

"We get it Lisa, you saw a fox. STOP talking about it."

In my defense tho, I DID see a fox in the area lol

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Dog Spam

I got a spam email this morning that had the subject heading ‘Is your dog lucky?’ First reaction was, duhhhh! Of course they BOTH are and went to hit the delete button. Then I started thinking about how my youngest one has been pretty darn lucky lately. In fact, she is fairly lucky overall, but for the sake of this blog post, I will name just two instances of her luck =)

The first one that comes to mind was a couple of days ago when I was reaching into the freezer to get some ice for a drink I was having. Generally, my husband and I use the ice machine on our fridge and the dogs *love* to come running when they hear it, as we let a few small pieces of ice hit the floor for them to have. The other day, tho, I was in the mood for the ice cubes – not the crushed parts of them – in my drink, but the youngest one decided she wanted to be in on the action anyway. I thought the pieces were too big (if you have seen her, she is a SMALL dog, only 6 lbs) for her to munch on, so I was trying not to drop any on the floor – but of course, I still do. She is there in an instant, grabbing up the ice cube and taking off with it to the living room. I follow her, as I thought she did not need such a big piece of ice, and she rolls over and clamps her mouth shut in an effort to keep me from taking it from her. However, I am an expert at prying her mouth open by now =) So I got it open and realized since the ice cube was so cold and she had it against her tongue for a bit, the ice cube had started to freeze to her tongue. I had to gently pull on it to get it off her tongue and out of her mouth, at which point I checked out her tongue to make sure it was ok. Once satisfied she was ok, she takes off in search of other things, totally oblivious that her life could’ve been a bit uncomfortable for awhile had she not been so lucky.

The second was a day or so before that, as I was checking in our hall closet for something. Both the dogs have a habit of following me about the house, but the youngest is worse. I had looked in the closet and couldn’t find what I was looking for, and was about to close the door when I saw something brown flash before me IN the closet. I scream and Sadie, the youngest pup, peeks out from behind one of the shoes like she was wondering what the fuss was all about =) She was quite lucky I did not spaz more and lock her in there as I ran off and close the door!

Well, anyway! That’s a few stories of Sadie, who in her own little way, has managed to be a bright spot in my life since Karma passed away a year ago. There is a lot of Karma I see in her – but she is still her ‘own’ dog ya know? Life goes on and she has helped immensely to make me realize it can still be a good life =)

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Car Wash Gripe

I went to wash my jeep yesterday & was reminded why some lunch hours are best spent either snoozing inside my jeep and/or reading a good book inside my jeep - instead of trying to be super uber productive and get stuff done.

I thought I would splurge and spend the 75 cents to sweep out the inside the jeep - even tho I *could* have waited until I got home and used our sweeper. The 75 cents only got me 3/4 of the way thru my jeep before it stopped - which, I guess in their defense - maybe a whole dollar's worth woulda got me there (since 75 cents is 3/4 of a dollar ya know? lol). I decide to wash the jeep next, as I did not want to break my $5 bill in quarters in order to have enuf quarters to run the sweeper again.

Soo......I was washing my jeep..... and manage to do so without anything going wrong. It was after I washed the jeep that everything went downhill....

I pull out and decide that I am REALLY gonna splurge and break my $5 bill and sweep out my jeep again. Not only will I sweep it out, but I will buy one of their cleaning sponges to clean inside as well. Impressed?

Don't be lol

I park by a sweeper, grab the $5 bill and run to the change machine on the opposite side of the car wash. I put my $5 bill in - I hear it *clink* 5 times for each dollar's worth of quarters - and then - NOTHING. No friggin quarters were spit out and needless to say, I was frustrated and hit the 'Gimme my change back damnit' button. STILL nothing *sigh*

It just so happened that one of the car wash personnel guys were not too far away. Normally, I wouldve let it go, deciding it was not worth it and leave. But it was not just one dollar - it was 5 friggin dollars. So I walk over to the guy and say:

"The machine took my $5 bill - it acted like it was gonna give me my money but it didn't".

Wordlessly, the guy goes to the other machine by it, sticks a $5 bill in from his pocket, steps back and says:

"There you go. It was *that* machine?" and he points to the one I used as I nod yes.

I say thank you, take the quarters and then go to the machine to get a sponge to clean the inside of my jeep. It takes me some time to realize where the sponge gets dropped at after the machine determines you gave it the appropriate amount of money, but I found the darn sponge and ran back to my jeep to start cleaning.

I managed to get thru sweeping it the second time and am about halfway thru cleaning the inside with a sponge when the guy walks back to me and asks:

"You said it was the machine on the left?", and as I say yes, he answers:

"Well, that machine does not show its short $5. The other machine does not either."

He then looks at me like I friggin stole the $5 dollars. I retell my story from before, and he repeats that he is not short $5 dollars. I sit there, not knowing what the heck he wants ME to do about it. I finally say:

"Well, I dunno what happened - I can give you back the money I have left if you want"

He said no, he was just trying to figger out what happened. F'N too dude! But it is YOUR car wash place, not mine. And I do NOT rip off older dude's at car washes in an effort to clean my darn jeep. Seriously? Did he expect me to say that yes..... I AM the famous car wash burgler. You are a friggin genius dude for catching me. Put me in handcuffs. Take me away!?

Grrrr!! And if he wasnt accusing me, why was he acting like it? And if he was just trying to figger things out, why was he asking ME? Do I look like I know what makes their F'N machines not F'N work?

The recession must be worse than I thought is all I got to say....

Tuesday, April 14, 2009


Yesterday was not that great - yesterday was a day full of frustration, curse words and a bunch of things just plain not going as planned. Today is better - altho tonite has been exceptional, mostly due to my ability to consume a Starbuck's double shot on ice, a 16 ounce energy drink and 2 pieces of Ghiradellis with caramel.

Thank goodness for stimulants such as these, as I am not sure how I would get thru some things without them. My masseuse does not find my remarkable ability to consume said products remarkable at all tho - she actually made the comment that perhaps I should *not* consume energy drinks. Can ya'all believe that? I mean, how can a gal relax during her massage if she is all peeved off at her masseuse beforehand for suggesting such craziness? lol

Well anyway...... she did mention the many benefits of lemon balm when I told her I bought some. I was informed you can buy lemon balm and plant it in your yard. I was also informed that even people who kill plants on a daily basis such as myself can keep these plants alive - they are very easy to grow. Methinks I may get some and purposely try to kill them just to prove her wrong.

Yes, I am very immature....

Lemon balm is supposed to relax ya tho, which is why it was brought up. Not sure why - I dont think I was blinking excessively from the energy drink I had before I got there. Maybe I was staring too much? Maybe I wasnt staring enuf? lol

Maybe I should quit typing this blog post when its obvious I am a little too buzzed from caffeine? =)

Friday, April 10, 2009

Farewell Dear Keds

I have been neglecting this blog lately *Lisa looks ashamed of herself* Life has just been too hectic, and lil ole moi has been too lazy to do anything about it when she does have the free time. Not to mention, I have been out of sorts the last few days - partly cuz my husband and I just got back not long ago from Vegas and the time change seems to have really messed me up.

I know, I know..... mwaaa.... boo hooo.... sniffle..... is what ya'all are thinking right? Oh well, *I* feel sorry for myself. And that feeling sorry for myself can largely make up for ya'all for *not* feeling sorry for me lol

I do want to dedicate this blog post to my Ked tennis shoes that are about to depart me, tho. They have been thru all sorts of weather, moods of mine and just plain ole physical wear and tear. The latter is probably is a little more harsh since I am not very good about keeping clothes, shoes and such clean and/or free of impending doom. Shirts have stains - pants have bleach spots - and shoes?

Shoes lose their soles.....

Uh huh..... yes ya'all! My latest pair of Keds decided they had enuf the other day and the bottom of the shoe just came apart. Super glue did an amazing repair job (Lisa makes a mental note to email Super Glue manufacturer and commend them on making a product with unbelievable abilities to make ANYTHING stick together), BUT even Super Glue could not fend off the inevitable.

I was in the airport at Vegas, got to my gate, sat down, got out my laptop and my shoe gave way again. It did its best to get me back home and since then has remained inactive, waiting for me 'let go' and its preparing itself for shoe heaven.

Yes, I said shoe heaven...... and yes, I have had WAY too much energy drink today lol