Tuesday, June 29, 2010

An Angry Post

Ya know, its amazing that when I woke up this AM, I didn't roll over and fall out of bed, break my arm and be taken to the hospital. Not to say that I have bene uncoordinated today...

No, wait.... yes, I have been. But Ialso think its just a matter of being *my* unlucky day. Its one of those days when I can just sit in my chair at my desk at work - not move, not do anything - but breathe. And that would miraculously cause something to happen around me or TO me.

And you know when you tell someone about your day and they don't quite believe you? Or maybe you are partly telling them the truth, but exaggerating the rest?

Yeah, that's me. My day *can* (and often will be) something you won't believe, something that only happens in the movies. Or people with incredible crappy luck. Like F'N me.

I filed away a bunch of files this AM and managed to get halfway thru when I hit my my knuckle on one of my fingers HARD. I remind myself I am at work and not to cuss. I remind myself that this particular finger was all messed up anyway. I then look down and see I have a cut thats bleeding on it, but neveryoumind - thats what bandaids are for right? I managed to get one put on and finish filing, go back to my desk to grab one of the many files *still* left there and cut my SAME finger on one of the files.

I was unable to remind myself I was at work before I cussed by the way...

I put another bandaid on, which being on the tip of my finger this time, made it a bit awkward to type, but thought I should leave it on awhile. I manage to get thru an hour before I cut my pinky finger on another F'N file.

Yes, I know its just a paper/cardboard cut. But seriously? 3 cuts all on one hand in one friggin morning? Why the f*ck does this always happen to me?

BUT.... its almost lunch time..... I will go to lunch, get something in my stomach, visit with my husband and everything will fix itself. I expect sympathy from my husband when I relate my story and show him my hand, but he laughs. And he laughs even harder when I start eating my honey mustard chicken snack wrap from McDonalds and the honey mustard drops onto my shirt. Will I let that deter me from trying to get in a better frame of mind? Heck no....

You admire the determination I have? The persistence? The ability I have to still try to be optimistic don't you? Yeah, well.... things still managed to be f*cked up, as not even a minute later I drop honey mustard on my shirt AGAIN and have yet to be able to get it off. It looks like F'N puke. Cuz apparantly honey mustard has particles in it that love to cling to my shirt. And nevermind the fact that its F'N yellow... ishh....

Yeah, lunch hour needed to be over. This day needs to be over. But as I was picking up my purse and getting ready to get out of the passenger seat of my husband's car, my work badge grabs to the seat and as my husband says 'WAIT', I manage to yank and tear off the clip from the badge. Its in two pieces now. Its in 2 F'N PIECES....


Friday, June 25, 2010

Stoopid is as Stoopid Does

It's been awhile since I have blogged huh? I will try remedy that from now on - tho, I do wish I could say this time away from bloggin has made me older and wiser, but apparantly its only made me older. Which I guess is good for all you readers out there (well, some of you anyway lol), but it certainly perplexes me why things have to be so darn hard for me....

Physically and emotionally, I have been somewhat of a mess lately. My husband felt sorry for me the other night when I complained of having a headache for a week straight and donated a painkiller of his to alleve my pain. In addition, after also whining about cold sores in my mouth, he gave me pills that help numb/help 'em mend a bit better.

Yep. My husband is where I go to for all my prescription needs. Needless to say, the poor guy is even more messed up than I am. But anyyway.... we will feel sorry for him another day, this blog post is dedicated to feeling for myself. SO there lol

So after a night of doping myself out with my husband's drugs, the next morning was a bit of a hassle. I woke up somewhat late, and put on the first reasonable outfit I could come up with and headed out the door. I was a bit frustrated with my pointey toed boots being scuffed up, but thought they were the only thing that looked decent with the pants I was wearing. And the pants? Well, after a trip to the restroom, I find out that one of the back pockets is tearing and you could basically see my err.... butt.

Yeah, I know. I can be super classey =)

ANYWAY! Needless to say, between having my pants ripping and my feet sore from the boots (not to mention I found out that we could wear jeans), I decided to go on an early lunch to Wal-Mart. I asked one of my coworkers where the closest Wal-Mart is at, and she told me about the one in Roeland Park that was only 5 minutes away. And other than questioning the GPS's knowledge of the roads, I arrived there in about 7 minutes ready to do one of the fastest shopping trips of my life.

Except most signs were in Spanish. Most of the store was arranged different. And there really was not much clothing to pick from. They did seem to really like Miley Cyrus at this Wal-Mart, and I have to say, I did find a cute shirt of hers that I *almost* bought. BUT, its a friggin Miley Cyrus shirt and I am almost 36 years old and I thought that me wearing it would just be plain odd.

AND it was a friggin Miley Cyrus shirt....

So needless to say, I found another shirt that was plaid and somewhat similar to Miley's, some new jeans, shoes and socks. I then clomped thru the store to pick out a microwave dinner for lunch, headed to checkout, paid and left.

Return trip and rest of the work day went by fairly uneventfully, and then I was headed out to a dentist appointment where I was sprayed at least 6 times with the water tube that 'swooshes out all that nasty gritty stuff' (dental assistant's words, not mine) of my mouth. I dried off and headed for home with my pearley whites...

And how do you know when your husband thinks your shirt is flattering on you? Well, its certainly not when he greets you with the theme song to the 'Beverly Hillbillies' - thats for sure! In addition, once I was standing in front of him, he unbuttons my last 3 buttons and tied it up just like whats her name on the show. Then, to make matters worse, he asks:

"Why didn't you just go to Target? There is one just 2 minutes away from where you work"

I spend a little while argueing with him on it, until he looks it up and it suddenly dawns on me that there IS a Target that is closer than the Wal-Mart was to work...

Needless to say, I had to tell my coworker I had a bone to pick with her the next day lol I swear she doesn't like me =)