Actually, the title is somewhat misleading. Yes, the gnat is stupid for bothering me, but I swear the gnats this summer have managed to take some steroids and vitamins to boost their ability to get away from humans before they get killed.
As I sit in my office this evening, I have swatted at a gnat about 10 times. And missed each time. I am typing and the gnat slowly flutters by my computer screen. I am not joking about slowly either, I swear if it was a human in the water, this gnat's speediness could be likened to a human lazily doing the breaststroke backwards. And yet, despite a brief hiccup in the lazy backward stroke it was taking, it still disappeared in the blink of an eye as I slapped my hands together in front of the computer screen. Since I did not see the gnat again for another couple of minutes, I thought I had already won the battle.
And then I saw it go lazily across the screen in the opposite way. And my hands slap together again with more gusto.......and I wait...
As I go through the process about 7 more times, each time trying to be quicker in my hands clapping together & therefore, by the end of the 9th time, my hands are pink and stinging from being clapped together so hard in an effort to kill the gnat.
After that, as I sat and stared at my stinging hands, I made the decision I was not going to care anymore. So what if I have a gnat fluttering across my screen? So what if I have an open drink it could possibly take a dip in and fly away leaving me disgusted at the what the gnat could have been doing in it? It is only a gnat. Heck, a gnat is an insect right? If it decides to take a dip and drown in my drink and I slurp it up unknowingly, then I will have won cuz I will have consumed extra protein for the day.
And as I thought that last bit, the gnat flew by right in front of my face and I slapped my hands together instinctively.
Stoopid gnat. I guess its bored. Leave me the f*ck alone lol